Also we have setup a Facebook Page for anyone who wants to friend the BOZOKast on Facebook, though you’d have to admit to listening to it if you did that.

BOZOKast Blog RSS: http://bozokast.net/feed/

BOZOKast Podcast RSS: http://bozokast.net/podcast/

BOZOKast Facebook Page: http://www.facebook.com/pages/BOZOKast/111299308905729

http://bozokast.net

Go update your iTunes subscription and be ready for the awesomeness of the BOZOKast in Technicolor. This will be the last blog post on clownpunchers.net until we bring the corporation back alive.

Adios.

It’s time for us to say adiós to EvE.

I won’t bore you with why we’re closing out doors. It’s none of your fucking business
I’m not going to say stupid faggoty shit like ‘we’ll be back! Just you wait and see!’. We might, we might not, it’s none of your fucking business.
BOZOKast will continue, because BOZO is bigger than EvE. More on that later.

Thank you to the following:

Yakuza/The Church
0utbreak
Stimulus (just them, not the rest of their faggoty alliance)
The blowjob queen Mynxee
The blowjob king Helicity
The gimp in a box known as Spectre

BOZO played EvE to fight…win, lose or draw. Rarely was there a fight we backed down from, never was there an enemy we bowed to. We never hid in our station until we could form a 40 man fag fleet, we never ran from even numbers, we never played this game like a bunch of fucking little bitches.

I will say this: if BOZO has ever smacked you in local and you said to yourself, “this is nothing but a bunch of nonsense. It’s their schtick…it’s just what they do, they don’t mean any of it.’ You were wrong. We meant everything we ever said. We hated you and everything about you. We hated how you play the game, we hated the fact your mother fucked some asshole and made you, we hated your wife, your kids, your fucking friends, your dog and your whole existence and everything in it. If we told you we wanted to fuck your mom in her mouth while a dog ate peanut butter off her flappy pussy, then we meant it. We weren’t kidding.

We always heard you faggots out there accuse us as being teenager, emo kids and the like. I would like you to know that BOZO was filled with nothing but old guys. We were all at least 25 years old, the average being about 35. Almost everyone was a professional in real life, ranging from medical doctors, scientists, engineers, police officers, soldiers, programmers…the list goes on. Even out of game, we were better than you.

There was no better ran, more organized or all around awesome corp than BOZO. There were no better pilots in all of EvE than our worst BOZO. Those of you who were in BOZO know that’s the truth and those that weren’t will never experience the awesomeness of Clown Punchers Syndicate.

In other news, Tolarus has been busy getting ready for Easter:

The BOZOKast team recently caught up with Evil Pookie. Battleclinic stat lover and self proclaimed leader of BURN EDEN. He is with us to discuss how he is awesome, how his corp isn’t, and how you don’t ever want to compare your stats to his because he is all about the individual and his corp can go fuck itself.

Spectre announces the winners of his contest, Helicity sounds like shit, Curse update and why the Voice of BOZO doesn’t have a man lover…all this and more in this episode of BOZOKast!

• Hulkageddon 2010
• Spectre’s Contest
• Gentlemen Clubs Mighty Contribution; Leading the Hard Fights!

We said on the BOZOKast that we would link the winners from Spectre’s contest, but I changed our mind. I don’t want to give it away without you experiencing the full awesomeness of the podcast.

Sign up for our BOZOKast feed here

If you’re a dumbass and close the inpage player, go to the feed and you can download it.

I decided to kidnap some blond bimbo and using my wife’s dull knitting needle, I tattooed my submission into her whore back. This is probably NSFW, so click at your own discretion….

I would encourage fellow BOZOs and fans to cruise over there and come up with something. I like the thought of Spectre coming back in two weeks with nothing in his hangers….

So put on your thinking caps and stick your minds in the gutter and submit your best Valentine’s Day limerick. We will collect all of your submissions and we will have our special guest read the best five in her super sexy Valentine’s Day voice. The one we select as the best out of the top five will receive a T-shirt with their limerick on it!

Submissions must be received by 31 Jan 2009 to be eligible. You can submit your limerick by leaving a comment on this post, sending an EVEmail to Clown Mistress, or emailing them to queb  at clownpunchers.net. The special guest will be revealed on 01 Feb 2009 after the submission deadline.

Reference: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_%28poetry%29

Yes, we love the BOZOKast. A question we always get is “What do you think about the other EVE podcasts?” Obviously we feel BOZOKast is the fucking best because if wer thought there was one as good or better, we wouldn’t waste our time doing our own. But mainly we don’t talk about others we like because it is so much easier and funner to talk about stuff you hate. So for all those asking, here is a completely unbiased BOZO rating of other EVE podcasts.

To set this up. I really really want to like other EVE podcasts. Today I decided to load up the MP3 player with the slew of of EVE podcasts that are out there (including ours) and listen to two episodes of every one and post a small review on our site and how they stack up directly against our podcast.

To keep this as unbiased and fair as possible, I loaded up two episodes of of each podcast. From the middle portion of a random season. I kept them paired together and made a podcast play list and I forced myself to listen to each one all the way thru no matter how much I wanted to stab my fucking ears out and tie my balls and neck up and hang myself to death in a closet.

The reviews below are not in order of suck, they are in order they were listened to. Links are provided to the podcasts that are worth a shit, the rest can go fuck themselves and you shouldn’t bother.

Review: Declarations of War (Noir.)

Boring. Intro music was faggoty standard issue EVE podcast bullshit. You make even your good fights sound boring. It is more entertaining to look at your KB and just imagine how it happened cause when you guys describe it makes me glad I wasn’t there. Also stop playing background music OVER FUCKING EVERYTHING. Turn on some good quality talk radio, some NPR or something fade that shit out and let the voices shine through. Some of you guys sound all timid and shit on the mic too which I can’t understand for 10+ episodes. Overall this shit sucked and bored me to death. Best part was deleting the files from my MP3 player.

Summary: Waste of time and bandwidth. Don’t listen to it unless you’re a Noir. fanboi or in the corp and are just looking to jerk each other off and rub it on your nipples because this isn’t entertaining for the outsider at all. Not Recommended.

Review: The Planet Risk Show

Mildly entertaining when compared to some others in the list, but when compared to the BOZOKast, this thing sucked shit. A bit better intro, but then it went down hill with some technoish faggy shit. They also decided to do the lets play fucking music for ever to distract you from how poor the podcast actually is. There is a reason I turn off the environment fucking sounds when I play EVE, I don’t want it in my podcasts! Fade it in and out! Their description of encounters were better than some, but you’ll want to stop listening after 20 minutes of this shit.

Summary: Turn this in to 15-30 minute max podcast and it won’t suck as much shit because if you troll through the 3-hours of suicide educing drivel you’ll maybe pick up 30 minutes of good content and that is being generous. Not Recommended.

Review: PODDED Podcast

Intro was good. They do the background effects properly; Other shows please listen to how and when they fade it in and out and then copy them so you can do it properly you fucking assholes. The content itself is mostly work safe so for the most part I found it mildly entertaining at best, but they move quickly from topic to topic at a pace that keeps me from hitting the [X] even without the quantity of poop, mom, and cock jokes I’d like to hear. The accuracy of the content for the most part is good and I didn’t want to razor blade my asshole after listening.

Summary: Well put together, good quality, and well edited. Not my cup of tea, but this is a BOZO approved podcast. Recommended.

Listen Here.

Review: Missions Collide

Intro was short and good. They plugged some $$$ making sponsor shit, I like that even if the hosting company they promote is shit. For carebears this was actually more entertaining that the sorry excuse for a podcast of some of the others I listened to. They made their ISK making, PvP attempts, and carebearing exploits sound interesting. They spent just enough time on each topic without lingering too much. Much like PODDED it was a little too tame for my taste and I felt like it was in lack of some good ol’ fashion smack.

Summary: I would call it boring, but not shit like Drone Bay or the Noir podcast. I can deal with boring because it just means their subject matter isn’t relating to me. The British guy is better than the EDIT: Canadian prick. Recommended w/ Reservations.

Listen Here.

Review: Warp Drive Active

They haven’t done a new one in a while (as of this blog post), but I still included them cause they did a lot of them. Usually shitty intros. Another one who really violates the music playing the whole fucking time they talk, fucking awful. Also the content is just COAD and the News and Dev blog RSS recorded in annoying voices. They aren’t funny and their jokes are boring and dry whether you’re from the US or a limey from the UK. Maybe it is a good thing they haven’t done one in a while cause they are shit.

Summary: Don’t waste your time. You’d be better off playing techno while you rape your sister. Not Recommended.

Review: Fly Reckless

I am really tired of these fucking podcasts and typing this blog post by now. So I’ll make these last few quick. I this one is OK … like fucking a fat ugly chick, I mean you’re still getting fucked right? Not super annoying. Doesn’t suck shit out of my asshole like the Noir podcast or WDA. Looking forward to WTFFTW.

Summary: Good enough to not make you kill yourself and listen again. Recommended w/ Reservations.

Listen Here.

Review: The Drone Bay

This thing is straight fucking garbage. Boring circle jerking by people who aren’t even awesome. I hope they all pile in to a van and get killed in car crash.

Summary: Save yourself from a early death via suicide, skip this worthless pile of shit. Not Recommended!

Review: MicroWarp: Cast (It’s dead, but we hate CrazyKinux)

Hosted by a giant faggot. His Canadian accent on radio makes you want smack yourself in the face with a hammer. The content is dry, boring, and uninteresting. It will also take anything that had potential to be interesting and turn it in to useless pile of shit. It is a couple years out of date now, but the site for it is still up so I wanted to slam it just because it sucks so hard. I’m glad this piece of shit failed and only did three episodes.

Summary: This type of awful pile of shit is the reason the BOZOKast exists. To make up for extra shit suck this causes the internet my making it more awesome! Oh right, Not Recommended!

There is obviously already a million posts out there about Hulkageddon II, but this one will obviously be the best because it is on the BOZO blog! If you haven’t heard you are most likely a dumb queer bag anyway.

I wanted to do a quick post for those in small corps or with useless alts who are not sure how to get involved. Remember it is not too late! Hulkageddon runs for 1 week and in just 23 hours of training (use EVEmon to establish the best plan) you can have a Minmatar noob character in a Thrasher shooting 280mm artillery loaded with Republic Fleet EMP. A small corp who can field just 10 pilots and an Orca for resupplying can have their fill of high-sec ganking with a very small ISK and time investment and have the chance at huge prizes! So don’t be a bitch, get out there, get ganking. There is still time!

Look for BOZO in the form of 8020! We will be out in force and giving updates on Twitter.